Last November we had a patient named Vu. Vu received a human valve transplant from a deceased American. This procedure was the first human valve transplant done in Vietnam. During the time Vu’s stay, I had the opportunity to chat with his father. We discovered that his father and I were not only both stationed in Da Nang during the Vietnam war, but also stationed on opposite sides at the Hai Van Pass. My unit’s responsibility was to destroy any troops and supplies coming through from the north. His job was to protect those troops and supplies. We realized there was a three-month period that we were probably shooting at each other. So during the Vietnam war we were enemies…and we were both bad shots so that’s likely why we’re still here!
That was last year. Moving ahead to this year. The first Tuesday of the mission I was called upstairs to the conference room. To my surprise Vu and his mother were waiting to see me. It was extremely emotional for me to see them both. They invited me to their home and I went to their house the following Sunday.
Vu’s dad and I were able to share some more stories and he showed me his medals. We were able to communicate our respect for each other as soldiers, and more importantly, we were able to sit down as friends.
Last November, the last day I was in Vietnam I was out shopping. I met a woman who was a shopkeeper, and she asked me if I was an American. When I told her I was, she then asked me if I was here during the Vietnam War. I told her I was here in 1968 and 1969. She then told me that her uncle was killed in July 1968, and that her father lost his leg in Da Nang in 1969. She said her family goes to Chu Lai every year to try to find her uncle’s body, to bring it home so his soul can be at peace. I became extremely emotional and started to weep, because all of the sudden the enemy had a name. He was someone’s uncle and someone’s father. This woman came over to me and she threw her arms around me and hugged me tight. She told me “not to worry, it’s not your fault. We are friends now.”
This was not an act of forgiveness, but an act of reconciliation. During the past year I have told many people about this act of reconciliation, and I wanted to do something for this woman. What I decided to do was to get a set of my Vietna
m War medals and give them to her for her uncle’s shrine, as a memorial for one soldier to another. I came back to Vietnam with the medals and when I walked into her store she recognized me immediately. With Pho Thu as my translator, I was able to give her the medals. She was very moved. Next weekend I will be going to her home for dinner, as she wants me to meet her whole family, including her father that lost his leg in the Vietnam war.
Vietnam has been a country of many surprises. The greatest surprise has been the lack of anger towards the U.S. team, considering how much damage was done during the war.
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